Today I am grateful for reframing. I have this single word framed on my wall. It’s also my wallpaper on my phone.

It’s probably the main arrow in my coping skills quiver.

Yes, the situation we all find ourselves in is surreal. It works well for me to actually not overthink things right now. Ignorance is indeed bliss. However, the years of remote working back in Durban days and then the retrenchment exercise along with having to work from home for 6 months all helped to prepare me for what we are having to deal with now. Ok fair enough, I had help and school was open, as too was aftercare, and indoor trampoline parks, but the point was that of all the things to stress about, my ability to operate effectively from home (again, that was sans kids) was not in question.

Reframe.

I am doing something I never ever thought possible. I am full time parenting two precocious bright spark kids, on my own, while full time working, at home, and full time cleaning, and still finding time to watch Ozark, update my WordPress site, and get some workouts in.

I am going to pause, and let that sink in.


I am doing something I never ever thought possible. I am full time parenting two precocious bright spark kids, on my own, while full time working, at home, and full time cleaning, and still finding time to watch Ozark, update my WordPress site, and get some workouts in.


Reframe.

If you zoom in to the detail I don’t do all of the above all the time or give 100% equally to each task. That is impossible. And I am proud to have the awareness to acknowledge that limitation. However, if you zoom out you get the bigger picture as I described above. Some days it’s all work and no play. Some days it’s duvet and popcorn day. Sometimes, due to absolutely no credit to my parenting skills, the kids just get on and quietly do their thing, leaving me in peace to get cracking with the job of work. Other times, and if I’m not taking credit for the good times, it stands to reason I can’t for the bad times, the kids literally climb the walls, scream for no reason and find the sound of the other person’s breathing annoying.

Reframe.


This lockdown has forced me to parent like I’ve never parented before.


I have never worked so hard, for so long, without an opportunity to gap it, whether it be the car ride in solitude to the office, the Saturday morning Virgin Active Pilates class, or the ability phone Jean on a Saturday afternoon for babysitting so I can meet up with friends.

Do I get through the day without shedding at least one tear? Hell no. But sometimes those tears are because Aiden has learnt to tidy up after building forts, water the garden, and wash his dishes (umm still working on that last point but the intention is there.) Sometimes those tears are because Ava helps me vacuum, sort the laundry and ration toilet rolls out to the respective bathrooms.

There is no doubt that we are all going to emerge from this changed. It’s up to us to determine the extent of that change. I am going to to come out of this, firstly alive, hopefully sane, and importantly a better parent with a deeper more fulfilling connection to my children.

#reframe



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2 comments

    1. Thank you so much. That is so kind of you and I’m pleased I can offer you something to look forward to. I jest get cracking on some more stuff. Have a great weekend.

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